That Perfect Blue

There have been two stressful events now that have made me see blue.  Like a blue haze over everything.  Like a film.  Kind of spotty.  And it exists somehow, ephemeral between me and what I see, if that even makes sense.  Can see it even when I close my eyes.  Kind of a cobalt blue - that's the closest pigment color I can think of to try to name it.  I've Googled this before, and I came up with literally nothing.  No explanation.  I talked to a friend last time it happened who assumed it was something like an aura signaling something deeper.  I wondered if it's a strange sort of stress migraine.  Or maybe it's some spiritual shift.  I honestly don't know.  But when I feel like everything is outside me and broken wide open to a place I can't comprehend in that moment (which is insanely rare for a control freak like me), I somehow am lifted up on to some other plane out of pure necessity to escape a moment, and things go blue.  Maybe it's my spirit saving me from something I need saving from.  Twice now.  As of tonight.

Try not to worry about me, if you are so inclined.  It didn't seem to have any lasting effect last time this happened many months ago.  I've survived way worse.

I'm reminded of a song, which in this moment somehow makes this unnerving blue a little less worrisome... it's the most human color, after all:

He stumbled into faith and thought
God this is all there is.
The pictures in his mind arose
And began to breathe.
And all the Gods in all the worlds
Began colliding on a backdrop of blue.

 

Blue lips
Blue veins

 

He took a step but then felt tired,
He said, I'll rest a little while.
But when he tried to walk again,
He wasn't a child.
And all the people hurried past
Real fast and no one ever smiled.

 

Blue lips
Blue veins

 
Blue, the color of the planet from far, far away

 

He stumbled into faith and thought
God this is all there is.
The pictures in his mind arose
And began to breathe.
And no one saw and no one heard
They just followed lead.
The pictures in his mind awoke
And began to breed.

They started off beneath the knowledge tree,
Then they chopped it down to make white picket fences.
They marched along the railroad tracks
And smiled real wide for the camera lenses.
They made it past the enemy lines
Just to become enslaved in the assembly lines.

 

Blue lips

Blue veins

 

Blue, the color of the planet from far, far away

 

Blue lips

Blue veins

 

Blue, the color of the planet from far, far away

 

Blue, the most human color

Blue, the most human color

Blue, the most human color

 

Blue lips

Blue veins

 

Blue, the color of our planet from far, far away.